Pregnancy and Infant Loss is Devastating

Going through a loss can be crippling. It makes feel like you are broken. You’re not sure if you can keep going. The pain seems unbearable and thinking of anything else but the pain just seems impossible.

Perhaps, it has been months or years since your child passed, and your grief comes in waves. You might be going through your day and you see something that reminds you of your little one. Then, you are consumed with tears and grief. You want to honor your child, your baby, and never forget them. But, talking about what happened is too hard. The pain is just too strong. You do not know what to do. People don’t talk about this pain. And, they don’t seem to understand what you are feeling.

If you feel like any of this resonates with you, we are here for you. As online therapists who specialize in helping moms, we are here to listen, to just be with you, and help you find a clear way forward while also honoring and acknowledging your child. Please reach out and schedule a free 20-minute chat and we can answer any questions you may have, and just get to know each other to see if we might be a good fit for your healing.

The Emotional Pain of Pregnancy Loss or Infant Loss

Society doesn’t talk about the devastating pain that comes with pregnancy loss or the loss of an infant or child. Unfortunately, some women are embarrassed to talk about this topic. There are no guidelines or manuals about what we are supposed to do or how we are supposed to move forward in life. You may not want to get over this loss because this was your child. A part of you. And the thought of not thinking about them feels unbearable. But, you worry that talking about it will make others uncomfortable.

No woman, no mother, should ever have to go through this; should ever have to say goodbye to their child. We cannot change that. But as therapists, we can be with you as you journey through the grieving process. We’ll offer you clarity when your head is foggy. And, we will listen and validate your pain when you don’t know how you will ever be able to get through a day again.

We can help you find ways to live again, not just survive. It will take time. It will not happen overnight. Grief is about feeling and wading through the deep, painful emotions. You have to acknowledge what you are feeling and allowing yourself to feel it.

It can be so hard. While we can’t take the pain away, we can walk by your side and support you.

Things that may Help after Pregnancy or Infant Loss

• When you are ready, speak to someone who has lived a similar experience

• Talk with someone close to you about how you would like to acknowledge the life of your child; maybe through rituals, a song, a poem.

• Think about abstaining from social media. Seeing pictures of others with their children and pregnancy announcements can be very triggering. When you return to social media, mute specific accounts that feel overwhelming.

• Tell close family and friends to not ask how you are doing. Ask them instead to send short texts or messages saying they are thinking of you.

• Find someone you trust to tell others about what happened if you’re unable or don’t want to share.

Counseling for Pregnancy and Infant Loss Can Help

Grief counseling can be helpful while processing the pain you are going through. Grief can be overwhelming and it can feel like no one understands you. Many times you might feel alone, feeling like you are the only one in this situation.

As online therapists, we can not take the pain away, but we walk through the emotions you are feeling to support you and guide you toward healing. A lot of times, there are many decisions to be made after a loss, and logistics to sort through. Having someone to guide you through those decisions, offering resources, and clarifying your wishes, can be very helpful.

Counseling can also be a great tool for you and your partner to help you work towards improved communication. It can be hard to share your emotions with your partner during this challenging time. They have their own grief to manage, so you might feel guilty talking about your own. At The Heard Counseling, we offer a safe space for couples to grieve together and feel their pain together. This allows you to feel connected to your partner as you move forward.