Tips for Talking to your Teen from a Teen Therapist
The thought of talking to your teen can seem like a daunting task – they are always moody and seem to want nothing to do with you! While it is true that teens can be particularly moody (hormones, right?), most times they do want to talk, they are just waiting for the parent to start the conversation! The parents don’t want to pry, so they wait for the teen to start the conversation, and before we know it, communication has stalled. The teenage years are some of the toughest years for individuals to go through because developmentally a lot is changing. Teens are experiencing significant brain development, social changes, body changes, all while trying to figure out their place in the world.
As a parent, it can be scary to experience your teenager going through all these changes and feeling like you don’t know how to talk to them. Coming from a teen therapist, here are some tips for talking to your teen:
Tip #1 for Talking to Your Teenager: Meet them where they are at!
One of the first things you learn when becoming specialized in teen therapy, is to meet the teen where they are at. This may not make much sense but let me break it down! Your teen is living in their teenager world, which means they likely haven’t turned on the news, read the latest article in the newspaper, or spent any kind of time checking out the stock market. Their world consists of video games, social media, and school drama – so ask questions about that! Teens are surprisingly chatty when you bring up the latest TikTok trend or ask them about what’s going on with their friends at school! This is a great example of meeting your teen where they are at because teens don’t really want to talk about adult things, they want to talk about teenager things, and any good teen counselor will recommend you (as the parent) brush up on recognizing the latest TikTok trends! Because the conversation will start with TikTok and before you know it, your teen will be talking about the things that really matter.
Tip #2 for Talking to Your Teenager: Keep an Open Mind!
Talking about video games, social media trends, and what color shoes someone wore to school may seem like torture to you as a parent. However, it’s important to remember that this is how teens communicate. What may originally sound like a superficial conversation, may turn into something incredibly meaningful – and even if it doesn’t, you are setting the groundwork for your teen to recognize that they can trust you and communicate with you in a positive way! Keeping an open mind is also important if your teen shares something with you that is less than desirable. Remember that they could have chosen not to tell you, so while you may not like what they are saying – at least they are sharing! Any teen therapist will tell you, sometimes what they are sharing isn’t what’s important. What’s important is that they are choosing to share, at all.
Tip #3 for Talking to Your Teenager: Pick Your Battles and Validate Their Feelings!
Sometimes, communicating with your teen can feel like you’re playing a game that you don’t know how to play, and the instructions are written in a language you don’t speak. If you’re feeling that way, you aren’t alone! Oftentimes, teenagers feel like adults, and desperately want independence – so if they feel like you are going to lecture them, or tell them “I told you so”, they won’t want to open up about anything. Learning to pick your battles is incredibly important when talking with your teen, because it can mean the difference between your teen opening up to you or not. Learn how to assess which things are important, and which things are learning experiences – and recognize how to handle each. Things that are important warrant a serious discussion, while teachable moments can be handled in a less serious manner. Learning when to have the serious talks, when/how to validate emotions, and when something can be turned into a teachable moment is all part of teen therapy, which could be beneficial for not only the teen, but the parents as well!
We Offer Teen Counseling and Teen Therapy in Miami and Online in Florida.
Teen therapy is when a specialized teen therapist, teen counselor will meet with your teen and help them address their individual roadblocks or struggles. However, teen therapy also involves the parents and can involve parenting education to give your more in-depth guidance for the most effective way to communicate with your teen. If you are looking for a teen therapist in Miami or online in Florida we are more than happy to help and guide you and your teen on this journey! We offer amazing therapy for teenagers in Miami, and encourage you to reach out if you have any questions!
How to Begin Teen Counseling in Miami or Online Teen Therapy in Florida:
If you think that your teenager might benefit from talking to a teen therapist we are here to help. We help teens that are dealing with anxiety, depression, issues with peers or family issues. To begin online therapy in Florida, or teen counseling in Miami here are the steps:
Contact our teen therapist through email or phone
Request an initial consultation appointment for your teenager with our teen therapist, April Brown, LMFT
Develop a plan with the teen therapist to support your teen in therapy